One of the first lessons I learnt in my performing days was that a tongue-in-cheek presentation could be as effective and possibly much more entertaining than one with pompous pretensions. And in pursuit of this, I spent as much on literature devoted to patter and one-liners as I did to books with new tricks and routines, sleights and subterfuges.
Robert Orben was the "guru" - one just had to have everything he put out for magicians. There were many others like Harry Allen, Ken DeCourcy and Val Andrews, who took their presentations with a pinch of salt, and hence were essential reading for me.
One of my most prized possessions in my Cabaret days was a book of 2000 Insults for all Occasions by Louis Safian. Hecklers were a given for every performance, and this was armor-coating with a fresh batch of ammunition for every show. My perusal of Allan Pease's Rude and Politically Incorrect Jokes far exceeds my fascination with his work on body language.
And the list goes on - because there lie the seeds of what can convert another "pick-a-card" into a memorable encounter for any audience.
This compendium is a compilation from a very different source, and the potential is truly mindboggling as this book will demonstrate. For with my new "co-authors" I bring you this collection of icing to your magic performances, - not a single line "lifted" from any of the above-mentioned "authors", and with nearly 2000 chuckles or guffaws in over 100 pages to add to your presentation. And these are just a sampling, once you realise the scope and potential, you can create as many more as you need.
These are one-liners far more specialized than one would find in the published bibliography of one-liners and comedy patter. Not just generalised lines adapted to use in any magic show, but lines tailored to your specific branches of magic (like mentalism, or escapes, or bar magic, or magic with silks, or ropes, or cards or coins or a general conjuring show.) You can get an abundance of quips, starting with the MC introducing you, to your act in all its hues, to getting volunteers on stage, or handling hecklers, to humorous openers and closers. These have been further cultured, to specific classic routines like the Miser's Dream, or Die Box, or Cups and Balls or Linking Rings or ... just glance through the partial table of contents below to get the idea. You get lines for every phase of the trick or routine - and even have complete scripts for a particular effect.
Partial List of Contents (with an average of 20 one-liners to a page)
- One-Liners for a Magician's MC
- Opening Lines for Magicians
- Closers for your Act
- Spice up your Card Tricks
- Quips for Rope Magic
- Coin and Money Magic
- Silk & Hanky Tricks
- Humorous One-Liners for Bar Magic
- Escapes - Tongue in Cheek
- One-Liners for the Mental Magician
- Cups & Balls
- Chinese Linking Rings
- The Multiplying Balls
- The Multiplying Balls - A Full Comedy Routine Script
- The Passe-Passe Bottle and Glass (and the Multiplying Bottles)
- A Comedy routine for the Multiplying Bottles
- Productions from a Box or Tube
- The Vanish
- Floating and Levitation effects
- The Professor's Nightmare
- Coin in Bottle
- Sucker Sliding Die Box
- The Miser's Dream!
- The Miser's Dream for kids
- The Cut and Restored Rope
- Quips for every Magician
- Heckler Come-backs
- When Calling Up a Volunteer
- More Applause Please
By any standard, this is worth many times more to any magician than the modest price asked. And I also give you the sources for 1000s more, for your performing style and requirements.
1st edition 2025, PDF 108 pages.
word count: 25945 which is equivalent to 103 standard pages of text
