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by Luke Jermay

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Words by Luke Jermay


The performer asks his audience if anyone has ever worked in telemarketing, sales conducted over the telephone. The performer spots one such person and has them join him onstage. Removing a script from his pocket the performer explains:

"Telephone sales, much like psychic readings, revolve around a predetermined script designed to influence the person on the other end of the phone -- whether the outcome happens to be the illusion of telling that person their future, or that an item is the best investment they can make. I have designed my own script that has a very specific outcome intended."

The performer hands the script to the spectator, who is asked to take a seat and to remove their cell phone. The performer ask them to call someone who will definitely be available and answer. The performer quips:

"I would recommend your least interesting friend or a baby sitter."

Continuing on. the performer moves to the front of the stage and allows the spectator to read the script to whomever they happen to have called.

While the spectator does this, performer holds large boards up to the audience at large. Each board has a different sentence printed on it. The first board informs the audience:

"Each word is designed to influence."

This board is dropped to the stage revealing another board explaining that:

"The words we use can often say much more than we are actually saying."

This board is dropped to the floor and the next board says:

"My script is designed to influence a choice. The choice of a number, shape, and a color."

The onstage spectator finishes their conversation and hangs up the phone. During the course of this conversation, the onstage spectator has asked their conversation partner to name a color, shape, and number.

The performer directs the spectator to remove an envelope from beneath their chair. Inside this envelope is a prediction detailing the color, shape, and number selected via the telephone.

1st edition 2006. 26 pages.
word count: 5734 which is equivalent to 22 standard pages of text

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